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Talking candidly about the human body isn't often easy, especially when it comes to reproductive and sexual health.
No matter the setting, trying to avoid taboo subjects often leads to awkward silences and unasked questions. And that's when we turn to the internet for help.
SEE ALSO:How to help when someone uses intimate photos as revengeWith relative anonymity, you can ask any question you were too embarrassed to pose in class or at the kitchen table. There's just one problem: Not all Google search results serve up the resources you need.
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For example, if you want to know what a menstrual period is like, a search engine will show you thousands of links, including information from a tampon company, crowd-sourced descriptions from an internet forum, a government-sponsored fact-sheet and a list of experiences specifically designed not for accuracy, but to make you chuckle.
Given the link overload, it can be hard to know where to start and who to trust.
"[The internet] can be a place free of stigma and shame."
There are, however, simple strategies to make this process easier, says Sophia Kerby, manager of state policy and partnerships for the nonprofit organization Advocates for Youth, which focuses on sexual health education.
"I think first and foremost, the reality is that many young people are turning to the internet because they’re curious." says Kerby. "Particularly for women, young people of color, LGBTQ youth, it can be a place free of stigma and shame."
If that's the kind of experience you want to have, try these four tips:
1. Know that your body and needs are unique.
While sex education is often seen as focused on the act of sex, Kerby's definition is expansive and covers topics such as human development, abstinence, reproductive sexual health, disease prevention and consent.
What's most important for young people to understand, Kerby says, is how their body works and what healthy relationships look like.
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Kerby stresses that there aren't two types of normal bodies. Instead, people's physical traits and experiences vary as does their identity and how they choose to express it. Kerby also believes it's vital to know your personal values and what you want from friendships and romantic partnerships.
These unique needs mean it's important to look for comprehensive resources that reflect a range of identities and experiences. Among those Kerby recommends are: Advocates for Youth, Planned Parenthood Federation of America, Sex, Etc. and Scareleteen.
2. Health and relationship information should not make you feel ashamed.
When you're reviewing a website on sexual and reproductive health, do a quick gut check with your emotions. Do you suddenly feel bad about who you are or how your body works? Kerby says that's a sign to seek answers and information elsewhere.
"Be aware of any resource that has language that is very narrow and that’s shame-based or stigmatizing."
"Be aware of any resource that has language that is very narrow and that’s shame-based or stigmatizing," she says.
This type of language can be hard for young people to avoid online and in real life. Several states, including Texas, Utah and Alabama, explicitly prohibit teachers from discussing lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender issues in a positive light, or at all, according to the Gay, Lesbian, & Straight Education Network (GLSEN).
While LGBTQ youth frequently encounter non-inclusive resources, Kerby says such information can also invoke strict gender roles or sexual mores that create feelings of shame.
3. Look for evidence-based information.
Only 24 states and the District of Columbia mandate sex education in school and just 13 states require that instruction to be medically accurate, according to the reproductive health and rights advocacy organization Guttmacher Institute.
But going to the web doesn't always yield better information. A 2010 study published in the Journal of Adolescent Healthfound that of 177 sexual health websites used by teens, 46% had inaccurate information on contraception.
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Similarly, while internet forums like Reddit, Yahoo Answers and Quora can provide crowd-sourced perspectives, Kerby says young people should rely on evidence-based information that's shared by reputable organizations.
You don't have to let such information dictate every choice you make, but it is important to know what's medically accurate and sound. Ideally, Kerby adds, the language conveying these messages should be inclusive and supportive of many experiences.
4. Find material that makes you laugh and think.
The internet contains a lot of sexual health and relationship content designed to spotlight the funniest, most bizarre human experiences. Kerby says you should think of this material as a complement in your search for accurate, inclusive information.
Credit: advocates for youth / facebookIf it's inoffensive and makes you laugh at the absurdity of our cultural taboos, then think of it as a way to broach a difficult topic.
"Having funny and cheeky material out there, it’s a conversation starter," says Kerby. "It's pushing down that door of what [our] perceptions are and allowing for a much more expansive and inclusive sense of ourselves and our own sexualities."
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TopicsGenderHealth